Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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