I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
