who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
