It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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