this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
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i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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