I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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