There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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