You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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