OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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