im drinking this country out of the recession.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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