I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
