I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
