He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
