My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
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i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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