If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
