Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
