For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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