airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
