Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
