Define "chronic" masturbator.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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