I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
