You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize