Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
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Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
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My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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