I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
