I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
