if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
