im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
