Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Randomize
