8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
