Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
