remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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