She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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