yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
