I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
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