Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize