Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.