What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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