It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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