this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
