Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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