had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize