Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
