you guys were way drunker than both of me
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
