We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
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