We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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