just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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