It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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