Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Randomize