It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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