Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
