we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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