drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
